Frequently Asked Questions

1.  How do I know that I need therapy?

Click here for the When to Get Help Checklist

In other words, ANYONE needs therapy from time to time.  I do not adhere to a medical model of doing therapy i.e. that you are sick.  We all suffer as part of living, some more than others.  The benefits of therapy are numerous, not only to heal from obvious problems, such as addictions, but to further get to know who we are and to live our lives abundantly.

2.  How long does therapy take?  Many managed care companies would have us think that all of life's problems should be cured in three to six easy sessions.  While this is very cost effective for them, it is not realistic.  It is true that some problems can be addressed and healed using a brief therapy model; however deeper problems, such as a sexual addiction, can take years.  This is a question to be addressed with your therapist and with a trust in the process of recovery.  Many times the healing process can be sped up with the use of techniques such as EMDR, hypnosis, and/or spiritual counseling.  Often I see clients for an initial period of time regularly, then have the client check in on an "as needed" basis.   In addition, group therapy can be another powerful way to address painful issues and heal in a more time-focused manner.  Please see the section on group therapy for more information.

3.  What about confidentiality?  None of the information about you, your name, what you say in session or even that I know who you are is ever discussed with anyone without your signed consent.  Confidentiality protection does not, however, include knowledge of abuse, neglect or exploitation of a minor, elderly or disabled person.  If you have a concern about confidentiality in a particular situation, please discuss it with me.

4.  What is Reiki?  REIKI is a form of healing that involves the laying on of hands on a fully clothed client in order to promote the balancing of energy within the body and promote a total healing of body, soul and spirit.  REIKI is not a religion.  It involves no doctrines, creeds or contradictions to the Universal Laws of Spiritual Consciousness and Unconditional Love.  No matter where the person may be at any point in life, REIKI will harmonize and embrace his philosophical center point, adding to it the Divine Presence. Enod was first initiated into Reiki One in November 25, 2006, and has been a Reiki Master Teacher since May 10, 2007.   

Lineage:
Mikao Usui
Chujiro Hayakashi
Mrs. Takata
Iris Ishikuro
Arthur Robertson
Emma Ferguson
Lois J. Wetzel
Enod L. Gray

5.  What is EMDR? EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing.  The client is prompted to move their eyes back and forth repetitively in a way that seems to stimulate both the right and left sides of the brain.  It is a proven method of healing not only trauma, but any disturbing memory that interferes with your present life.  EMDR does not require the use of talk therapy and takes a fraction of the time that traditional talk therapy does.  When a disturbing event occurs, it can get locked in the nervous system with the original picture, sounds, thoughts and feelings.  This material can combine factual material with fantasy and with images that stand for the actual event or feelings about it.  EMDR seems to unlock the nervous system and allows the brain to process the experience.  That may be what is happening in REM or dream sleep---the eye movements may help to process the unconscious material.  It is important to remember that it is your own brain that will be doing the healing and that you are  the one in control during the sessions. Many times, EMDR is used in addition to individual talk therapy to not only speed up the healing, but to get at unconscious material that the conscious mind may have blocked. 

6.  What is spiritual counseling?   Is this the same as religious counseling or pastoral counseling? Spiritual counseling is not the same as religious or pastoral counseling.  Religious or pastoral counseling is usually provided by a religious leader, rabbi, minister, etc. and is specific to a particular religious tradition.   Spiritual counseling is a way of addressing one's spiritual healing using a psychotherapeutic approach.  Human beings are all born spiritual creatures.  We have a need within us to seek the Divine.  I encourage the client to find the spiritual path that is right for them.  I start by taking a thorough evaluation of the client's belief system and where they are in their spiritual journey.  Some people were traumatized spiritually as children and I guide the client in becoming conscious of their spiritual wounds.  Moreover, any form of abuse, be it physical, emotional or sexual is spiritual abuse because it wounds the soul.  In avoiding discussion of Spirit we have done ourselves a great disservice.  I come from a Native American background that views all of creation as part of the Web of Life.  In our fast-paced lives, it is easy to lose connection with our Father Sky and Mother Earth.  But we are living in a time when He/She will no longer be ignored.  My goal is to go with you on your own journey of spiritual healing.  I don't heal you--you heal yourself--YOU find the answer within yourself with the help of your own Higher Power.  I just help you to become CONSCIOUS!  I don't promote any one particular religion.  All are portals to the Divine.

7.  Can addictions be cured?  Many people ask this question.  First, we have to define what we mean by "addiction."  If addiction can be defined as use of any substance and/or behavior that keeps us from feeling (and thereby keeps us unconscious of reality), then I would say that as long as we are on this Earth we have to stay awake and aware that "the addiction" is ever present to put us back to sleep again and not be fully alive.  Some addictions are not as destructive as others, such as workaholism, religion, excessive talking, compulsive cleaning; some addictions are deadly and lead us down the path the destruction.  Examples of these are addictions to alcohol, drugs, sex, eating, NOT eating, etc.  These types of lethal addictions require use of all the tools of recovery to address them.  After all, it is your life.  So I would rather say that for many people, addictions can be "arrested".  Which leads us to the next question.

8.  Do I have to attend 12 step meetings to get free of my addiction?  Twelve step provides the very best environment in which to heal from addictions.  It helps you establish a vertical connection (i.e. a connection with a Higher Power of your understanding) and a horizontal connection (others in the program who understand and suffer from the same type of addiction.)  Every human being suffers and every human being needs both a connection with the Divine and with others.  And, it is free.  Your addiction usually won't like your attendance at 12 step in the beginning, but it is necessary so that you can learn to live consciously and learn to really live.  Which leads us to the next question.

9.  Will I have to attend 12 step for the rest of my life?  Many addictionologists say that you will; however, I don't agree.  Some people WILL have to regularly attend 12 step--being involved in 12 step is the only barrier that keeps them from using or acting out.  That is a fact.  And I believe each individual who learns to be honest with him or herself knows if that is the case for them.  However, others who truly devote themselves to recovery, get a sponsor, work the 12 steps (not just Step 1), associate with others in the program, get therapy to address the reasons they got addicted in the first place, LIVE what they have learned, and establish a RELATIONSHIP with their Higher Power can stop attending “all those meetings” and just go when they feel the addiction creeping back into their thoughts.  Another thing to consider is the 12th step--passing it on.  Helping others who suffer is a wonderful way of keeping awake and aware of where you have been.